Tuesday, May 4, 2010
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Interview with Alfonso Aguilo
RECONCILING
Take a
Interview with Alfonso Aguilo
Vice European Institute of Education (IEEE).
Learning to educate the feelings remains one of the major outstanding tasks. Often forget that feelings are a powerful human reality, and that, for better or for worse, are usually what drives us stronger and brings us back to our action.
People who enjoy a good educación afectiva suelen sentirse más satisfechas, son más eficaces y hacen rendir mejor su talento natural. En cambio, quienes no logran dominar bien su vida emocional, se debaten en constantes luchas internas que socavan su capacidad de pensar, de trabajar y de relacionarse con los demás. Sobre estas cuestiones entrevistamos hoy a Alfonso Aguiló, autor del libro Educar los sentimientos (Colección "Hacer Familia", Palabra, 1999).
EL OCASO DE UN MITO
- ¿Siendo tan importante la educación de los feelings, why so many people consider IQ as the main indicator of the personal skills?
- The longstanding issue. Since the early twentieth century, the idea became widespread that IQ is a fact of invariable and decisive game in the life of a person. Fortunately, that idea came into crisis many years ago, it is clear that having a high IQ can predict who will get perhaps as academic success is often evaluated in our educational system today, "but not much else. Not a guarantee of professional success, let alone successful and happy life.
There are many other capabilities that are more important, and among them are those relating to education of the feelings, as self-knowledge, self-control and emotional balance, the ability to motivate yourself and others, the social talent, optimism, ability to recognize and understand the feelings of others, etc..
- How to pay as much attention to the education of feelings, there is no risk of falling into an overly sentimental education?
- They are different things. Being a man of great heart, or have a deep emotional capacity, does not in itself a danger. And if it is, will be in the same way that it is dangerous to have a strong will and a prodigious intellect: it depends on what you use.
Obviously, this is not the reason to replace the feelings, nor otherwise. It tries to reconcile head and heart, both the family and in the classroom or in human relations in general.
RECONCILING
HEAD AND HEART
- And how you can find that balance?
- At first, we can not discredit the heart because some consider it mere sentimentality, neither intelligence because others see it as a mere rationalism or because others will reduce a fool voluntarism. The key is finding a good harmony.
For example, in recent decades have disclosed various crusades against different problems that threaten our society, school failure, alcoholism, teen pregnancy, drugs, youth violence, etc.. However, once again and found that often arrive too late, when the situation has reached major proportions and is strongly rooted in the lives of these people.
And that happens because the information, though important, usually resolves itself very little. Most times the problem is not the drug itself, or alcohol, or school failure, but the emotional crisis that cross these people, and lead them to seek refuge in these errors.
- Is the solution then is to better educate the feelings?
- In large part, yes. Man is not always enough to understand what is reasonable and then, only with that, practice. Human behavior is full of shades and nuances that escape the rigors of logic, and walking free moving springs of the will and subconscious feelings.
- have a lot of heart but sometimes betrays ...
- It is clear that there are numerous flaws and defects that can coexist with a big heart. There are people of great heart who are alcoholics, angry, lying or dishonest. But in general we can say that the richness and fullness of a person depends largely on their emotional capacity.
Most truly human is to be a person of heart, but let it tyrannize us. That is, without considering the supreme guide of our lives, but having it be intelligence educate whoever is appointed. Educate them to take us to great things passionate, with ideals worth fighting for. It is true that passions do mourn and suffer, but that does not have to be a bad thing because "maybe you can give a good lesson, or take out a major project, or really love another person, from indifference? Without passion, would they have been great men who have filled with light and power our history, our literature, our culture? While our passions to educate us more human, freer, more valuable.
REALITY "Dark and mysterious?
- Do you think that education is a task feeling a bit neglected?
- Yes As noted by José Antonio Marina, the misleading impression that the feelings are real dark and mysterious, irrational, almost beyond our control, has resulted in many people a substantial deepening disinterest in their education. However, the feelings are influenced, correctable be stimulated. Can be modeled much more than it at first appears.
is true that most of the feelings can not be produce directly and freely. We can not create feelings of joy or sorrow with the same ease with which we do other acts of will (as governor, for example, arm movements). But we can influence our happiness and our sadness in an indirect way, paving the way within, stimulating or rejecting the emotional responses that arise spontaneously in our hearts.
- Some consider this is to hide the spontaneous feelings to be replaced by others who do not actually have, and therefore false, or at least artificial .
- I think it should not be so, since what is sought is not distorted feelings, but to build our own emotional style. We must be the protagonists of our own lives, instead of thinking that we are inexorably tied to a romantic destination.
If a person says, for example, which is being dominated by feelings of envy, or selfishness, or resentment, what you should do is try to contain these negative feelings, while seeking to stimulate the corresponding positive feelings. Thus, over time achieved they will carry the day on those, and so will positively transform their own emotional life.
- And the feelings influence the virtues?
"Every sentimental style favors a stock and hinders others. Therefore, every sentimental style help or hinder a psychologically healthy life, and help or hinder the practice of virtues and values \u200b\u200bthat we want. You can not forget that envy, selfishness, aggressiveness, or laziness, are certainly shortcomings of virtue, but also gaps the proper education of the feelings that help or hinder such virtue. The practice of virtue promotes the education of the heart, and vice versa.
BE GOOD PERSON
- What do you think that relationship between education of feelings and moral education?
- I will answer based on an example. I remember once, long ago, when a professor friend of mine, referring to a student of his eleven years, looking nice and awake, he said:
"That kid is really extraordinary, a very talented person ... it is a pity you do not have a good heart. He likes to entertain others throw them in trouble
and then removed him slip out of the way. usually go about their business, although, as is done, you know to hide. But if you look closely, you realize that it is selfish to amazing extremes.
very good notes, and have great potential for almost everything. The bad thing is that seems to enjoy humiliating to those who are weaker or less intelligent, and insensitive to their suffering. And do not think that I have a hobby. It is the brightest of the class, but not a good person. I'm impressed by your head, but I am terrified her heart. "
When we look at cases like that guy, we understand immediately that should be paid particular attention to moral education. And that a good education sentimental has to help, among other things, to learn, if possible, to enjoy doing good and doing evil feel angry.
- That's not always easy. How can this be achieved?
- Within us there are feelings that push us to do well, and, with them, swarm also others like infectious insects that threaten our moral life. So we must try to shape our feelings to help us as possible to feel good about what helps us build a harmonious personal life, full and accomplished. And to feel bad otherwise.
ATTRACTIVENESS WELL
"But there are times that doing good is not at all attractive ...
- is true, and therefore I say that we must seek to educate the feelings to help as possible to the moral life. For example, if a person feels discomfort when lying, and satisfaction when it is sincere, it will be a great help in the moral life. Like if you feel uncomfortable when it is unfair or selfish, or lazy, or unjust, because all that you walk away from those mistakes, and sometimes with much more strength than many other arguments. Hence, knowing the importance of educating vividly show the attractiveness of virtue and goodness.
- Why is it so important that image?
- If a person manages to form an attractive idea of \u200b\u200bthe virtues you want to buy, and try to bear in mind these ideas, it is much easier to get to have these virtues . Achieved, moreover, that this path is less painful and more satisfying. Conversely, if you think constantly in the attractiveness of services to Avoid (A poor and despicable appeal, but always there, and whose power should not be underestimated), it is likely that the undeniable charm that always have those errors make it harder for them unstuck.
So delve into the attractiveness of the property, to represent it within us as something attractive, cheerful and inspiring, it is more important than it seems. Many times, the improvement processes are undermined simply because the image of what you get is proposed is not sufficiently suggestive or desirable.
- So, with an excellent education feelings effort would cost only lead an exemplary life?
- It is clear that cost less as usual. Anyway, no matter how good the education of a person, do good, you will often be a mature, sometimes larger. But that person knows that always wins with the good work.
Entre Familia Soy Feliz
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much should help a child at home
's 8 night. Even better would be to speak of the critical hour.
There are still doing homework, the shoes are quite dusty, poor get the baked chicken and the dad is coming to face one day have been fatal. What a wonderful, thought to be inside the mother, which my kids cooperate a little more. They're pretty big!
But is it just a "little" what ought to expect a teen mom, or what would be fair to put the shoulder every day?
Antes de hablar sobre la ayuda que podríamos pedir a los hijos, hay que referirse al tema de "no dar más trabajo" del que ya existe en la casa, lo que, por cierto, no es nada fácil de conseguir: que no entren con los pies embarrados, que no dejen la cocina inmunda cada vez que la usan. Es decir, mucho antes de pedir ayuda a los hijos en la casa, hay que haberles inculcado el no dar más trabajo, y es entre los 7 y los 11 años, principalmente, cuando los niños adquieren determinados hábitos de sana convivencia familiar:
- La ropa sucia no se tira al suelo, sino que se deja en el lugar indicado.
- Los desperdicios se tiran al basurero, no en cualquier parte.
- Las toallas se dejan colgadas en la percha, no tiradas en el suelo.
- Las puertas no se abren ni cierran a patadas, porque se ensucian y rompen.
- Al llegar del colegio las mochilas y el uniforme se dejan ordenados, no esparcidos por la escalera.
Estos son signos de buena crianza. O detalles, dirán otros, pero que cuando los padres no los han cultivado y exigido con perseverancia, generan, después, other problems in adolescence. The children do not value the work of others, or what it means to live in an orderly home, and their implications in the use and exploitation of available resources. Shall not be considered part of a team where they do or do not do affects others.
Therefore, when children have been trained since childhood to implement these habits, the daily work of the house looks quite relieved. Only then can we think to ask certain contributions to our children. These "aids" can be divided into three groups:
- Decisions involving himself: to maintain his room, desk and closet organized, put his clothes for the next day, make the bed the weekend.
- Those that are related to the coexistence and involve rapid provision of assistance: answering the phone rather than let it ring until the other side gets bored, pick up what's lying, stretch the carpet to avoid the next landing on the floor.
- Those that relate to the welfare of others: to buy bread, washing ...
Nobody benefited the child
That a son to take over their own affairs should be a continuing obligation, because although apparently this help is a relief for the mother and the maid The biggest beneficiary is himself. Much better for him to know where to put the black jacket and he hid the first letter of the friend, who spend hours and hours looking.
may sound harsh to say and more parents hear it, but if a child between 12 and 16 years is not able, at least, than worry about things, no one but the parents are responsible. Why? For the overprotective and treat it as a small child when it is not or because they have not given a minute to recognize their abilities. Case in point: the father who asks his son of 12 that will plug the hole, before which the child, astonished, replies: "Great, if today was not allowed to touch the plugs!" Or because they feel the "inexhaustible wealth syndrome" that mother that when her daughter was 15 years study trip was requested, please do not come back with all the dirty underwear. Easy, he thought his daughter, and bounced away.
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will be much easier to get any kind of help, to the extent that we see our children that the house is not a board where you eat and sleep, but a home. And, therefore, parents and children must understand that all these "aid" are not just for the house to "work", but that there is more harmony.
Every day, countless situations arise that require the assistance of all: the phone ringing, the lights on, no paper in the bathroom, etc.. It is therefore important to make clear that the family is a team and it is therefore essential that you use the bathroom spotless must leave to the next.
This type of aid, rather than required, they are taught, which requires perseverance and, of course, for example.
Can I replace it?
Finally, aid is related to the welfare of others and that make up the dream of some parents: their children to replace in tasks that correspond to them: the purchase of the house or studying with the younger siblings.
All families will comes time to use these orders, either because the mother works in an office, because there is an employee is out of doors, or simply because it is a large family. But here the parents should be aware that it is only an aid and in no way relieves them of being responsible for it in the pantry is not a can of tuna or that the Theresa might have gone wrong with the math test.
must be careful in this regard, to avoid the temptation to ask adolescents orders familiar to those who are not yet mature. Here the wisdom of parents in proposing aid is essential. Must be specific and ask them for a limited time only serves as requested be rotated among siblings of similar ages. The idea is that the order did not seem like a punishment. Examples: pay some bills, cooking when the employee is or go get his brother to school.
not forget to ask for some help does not interrupt, unless necessary, their obligations, duties, hours of study, school commitments, nor stand in their views. The most logical and sensible, "is that if the Sabbath is invited to a barbecue, go and not be washing dishes.
In practice
managers should consider as a partnership and not as a required task. Hence the importance of showing children that they are made for the love of family and home.
- Good appeal to children, although there is household help. Ultimately, any work performed within the home, is home to good habits.
- Orders should be allocated regardless of the sex of recipient. Life has many turns and is very useful that a man knows how to make toilet and a woman can fix a plug. Should be given the opportunity to learn to do everything at home.
- Between 12 and 16 years is the stage of the lugs. They are larger but also more disjointed. It may not be appropriate to ask them to be responsible for washing dishes, unless the slab is downright cheap.
- a "no" payment for favors granted. From time to time I will not misspell a small reward, but from there to set it as a policy home would be fatal. Will never love anything or home or to others.
- No, also to the inconsistency of the parents. Signal is bad for children if they see their parents treating them like children at times, sometimes as adults. If they send them alone to do some processing of the father, although they can go alone to the house of a friend (obviously, if distance and time do not pose a risk).
"Why not me it help?"
- For correcting you go back and doing it all again. We must tolerate the rumpled bed, the covered positions backward, poor rinsing dishes ... No one does things right the first time. Your child will feel important if you believe and believe in him and his abilities.
- Because we know how to ask the right help. First look and see what the natural abilities of each child. Do not ask him to keep it sharper dishes.
- Because you're a neat freak and likes that his house is spotless 24 hours a day. Wait a teenager when it ordered her school books or "move" to sweep the garden is patience and tolerate the mess for a while. Check the attack and, once requested aid, do not you.
- Because, perhaps unwittingly, is overprotective, you no longer remember what he could do at that age, but more of what you think. Children from lower income families are far more autonomous and since very little alone go shopping, take their siblings to school and take care while parents are at work.
Entre Familia Soy Feliz
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The question is formula as follows: if you have too many children, can not give them the same as if you only have one, two ... at most three. Even sociologists are brainy quantifying the problem very well, even with algebraic formulas. For example, if you belong to the middle class, or a public official or self-employed professionals, or own a commercial establishment, and has two children, may give higher education, eligible English courses abroad and pay the entrance of an apartment with two bedrooms, living room and kitchen. Ie, facilitates the happiness of the elderly. But if you have three, you can not pay the entrance floor, and if you have four say no.
This digression I was raised as a result of an article a few months ago, which claimed that it was necessary that our children know riding, or perform multiple extracurricular activities to make them happy. But unwisely, finish the article with a question: So what do you advise us? And indeed, some readers TELVA, with charming naivete, I ask: what would you advise us to make our children happy? If I were able to answer that question, would be the wisest man in the world. To get out of ground answer that love them very much and they are known ones.
But in a conversation in which I participated recently, one of the assistants, not so elementary as to reply, had insisted on knowing how we want, and if we could wish the same to many that a few children, and how far too many children did not limit their training opportunities or were deprived of a reasonable material welfare. A mess. The only thing clear is that in these times the problem is not too many children, but failing that, especially in Spain, where you women are being fatal as far as fertility is concerned, with a rate of 1.6, the lowest in the European Community.
To this end things have come, according to a survey by the University of Valencia, what they miss most English children are siblings to play with. I already had found me in my family, and collateral families that start from the same stock. Each time one of the women in my life is in a state there is a real shock, and when the child is born, the burst of joy is epic. One of my older daughters had two children, and as you have more serious problems, has started proceedings to adopt complex Colombian children. Why Colombians? Because there are more and may even take two at a time. The latter is what I wanted my daughter, but her husband has convinced you that it is best to test one at a time. Those who are most happy are his two sons (14 and 12 years), with the idea of \u200b\u200bhaving a new brother. To me, given the love I have for those countries, I do not dislike the idea of \u200b\u200bbecoming the overnight in an Indian grandfather chibcha, peasant or mulatto.
What?, Might ask, is that you favor a large family? On this occasion I have another answer: neither am I or ceased to be, but I live immersed in it for ever and ever. I was born the youngest of nine children, in turn, have had nine children. Therefore only know how to live within larger families and my impressions are not living bad. Sometimes living together is complex, arduous, but never boring.
Returning to the topic at hand: what is needed for children to be happy? Well, according to the survey from the University of Valencia, we have seen that having brothers is needed, because if not, especially in large cities, feel isolated and just looking for company unless it suits them: the indiscriminate television. But according to the same study, 98 100 of the children surveyed (ages 4 to 14 years) what attracts them most is being with their parents. And here's the great paradox: many parents are well-meaning but somewhat clueless, they spend much time away from home, work, and do not want to have more than one or two children to give them everything. Anything but what appears to be that kids want: more brothers and his only companion.
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HAPPY CHILDREN LIVING IN THE WORLD ... DOXA.
Entre Familia Soy Feliz 
THE WORLD LIVES IN THE DOXA ....
By: Manuel Lule
Hey friend, I have a terrific remedy will cure you, tomato this and ready. Not if I tell you ... the referee is blind or sold, should have removed ... Hey if I was deputy true that would make the changes necessary to expel all of the government ... rats!
many times have we heard at a party or meeting how are you social phrases or type of these, my dear fellow readers today we are all doctors, all are excellent sports analysts and why not ... the perfect candidate to tell the president how we do things in this country ... and wonder me when we argue about what information we believe solves what merely, from which we needed to do a trial and still dare to say is that this is my truth ... No doubt, we live in a world based on the Doxa and very far from the epistemic.
These two ancient Greek words are highly appreciated by philosophers, who will readily help one to remove the veil from the eyes and make us understand a little more because we live in a Mexico that sometimes becomes mediocre and lacking in culture, let me explain. DOXA To the Greeks referred to the mere opinion that a person had on their world and the intellectual knowledge EPISTEME was based on studies, based on things with sustainability, however, a person Doxa just issued their judgments based on mere experience, while the philosopher usually generated episteme, namely, knowledge solved by reason, in short the judgments issued were based on actual reasoning developed by the study.
give you an example, just that some news commentators issue a statement, which at times is ample and has no basis because we believe it if it were an absolute truth, this same information brief the pass from mouth to mouth, generating a mere opinion of the matter, beyond our circles close, fell to ill-intentioned political and politicized things we do on both sides and again he is the proposal that can change the country, gossip, allegations and things that do not help ... nothing.
Do you realize? ... we are engaged in mere opinion and not substantiated reasons, ever heard of a specialist lecturer in the sentence field reached the bottom of my heart "to give reasons for our hope" on what basis do we say this or that said , what sustains it, the Greek philosophers to search for the reasons led them to investigate, to study other thinkers and that they caused an unquenchable thirst to know, then explain it with a very simple scheme.
analysis this: If I want to make judgments just because you get While this can be very tricky as it may not have sufficient information that supports what I say, then it is best not to comment and recognize ignorant on the subject ... yes indeed sounds harsh but it is, you ignorant, and if you have the humility to admit you're ready for the second step, is going to be to study, research to investigate and be amazed at the things you will discover about this or that thing, wonder as do the children in their learning process, this speaks of the thirst for learning, the desire to become a better person, the desire to transcend this world.
grown Next step then and only then will be able to enter the same Episteme will generate more capacity for wonder, this is an endless cycle and it is what is really does have real knowledge.
We explained a teacher in philosophy, "what happens is that we've cheapened and diluted knowledge", we think it is written on the internet is absolute, that why I said this or opinion which leader is true, is more than that appeared in a gossip magazine is unique because it is then said Niurka and your true .... please, this is pure Doxa and causes us great harm to the culture in general.
So what can be done very simply feel that we are ignorant people who do not know everything and continue to promote the learning circle lest we lose our sense of wonder, a good book, a good magazine based on verifiable facts, in short can be as good television, but with all that we want to keep it to "War of the sheep jokes Nava Telehit passing through ... then what we filled the heart to express to others ... please.
Today our children have many channels of information, our responsibility is to know the origin of this information and lead to the boys for what it truly is healthy, everyone has the opportunity of sending messages through this world of communications but this does not mean it is the best for our lives, our families. I believe and am convinced that we move ever closer to the formation of opinion in our children, that is, every time we have to work harder on them so they are prepared to exercise sound mind in the event, with the friend who offered drugs, pornography or vices of drinking, so that when we as parents are present, they can decide properly so that nothing hinders their nature against person and human dignity.
This will be achieved to the extent that they acquire knowledge and culture, as generations who are addicted to human development study and, in so far looking good and strengthen the common bonds of solidarity.
We purify our generations and fomentémosle study and serious, that is, we fight because they do not get carried away by the Doxa and are seekers of episteme.
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FALLS IN MY HOUSE
Entre Familia Soy Feliz 
FALLS IN MY HOUSE
BY: MANUEL LULEÅ
why I wanted to begin telling this story, because unfortunately there are a large number of parents have forgotten that they enjoy their children, they have forgotten to laugh with them and they have forgotten to do so ridiculous, so having a good good time, specialists say that many of these parents fall into the syndrome known as adultism , this is in simple words "take a roll too harsh parenting and forgetting the good things of life. "
Perhaps some readers misunderstand me and criticize me for being exaggerated, perhaps one could say "I have no time for silliness or other work and I precede economic lack common in our country for a long time joy to the children, but let me explain one thing, the continuous increase of the adult can lead to difficult situations with children, let me show you some figures from the situation that exists in Mexico.
According to UNICEF surveys Recent Mexico suffers 35% of its violence in homes due to abuse of adults about their own children, some shocking figures reveal that 80 000 children and adolescents die each years in the country as a result of the scourge of violence in their homes.
What is happening to us in our homes?, What is lost when the floor in communication with our children?, What condition is the person loses control when their children? ... .
All these questions are linked and we create a culture of violence, but I wonder, how to celebrate in Mexico the next day the child if we have these alarming figures weigh on us as a society? ...
Among the most frequent acts of violence are: physical, psychological and sexual, said Jacob Pinheiro, who noted that such abuses are committed in most cases mothers, fathers, stepfathers, stepmothers , host parents, siblings and caregivers.
Therefore it is necessary to break cycles of violence that are rooted in the depths of our families, first we need to recognize that is taking a form of violence in our family, could be a mother, father or a relative, sometimes a neighbor is the trigger that can complain to stop.
generator violence must recognize first that has a problem, it will not solve it alone and need assistance, therapy, approaching a specialist who can help find the root of this violence for no return to cancel the same, violence is a circle of vice cyclic sooner or later tends to recur more and to a greater degree of reactive behavior, the aggressor must therefore find their origin stop, knowing the causes that trigger and forming a new attitude and mindset through a new process habits that lead to liberation from the chains of oppression, then we show the cycle of violence that greatly helps those close to the problems to stop its continuity.
While we do not stop and the offender awareness especially in the stage of apparent calm, hardly banish violence from our homes, now or at any stage of the cycle can stop and prevent the attack there have been reports that at the time of the explosion have had to step up enforcement authorities and to avoid reactions, dear friend, how important is to break the cycle violence.
There rehabilitation clinics, therapists, family therapists, in short, a number of professionals who can deal with such cases and help solve the violence in the family but the first step is to realize that something serious is happening and it's time to make a high.
Enough of such hackneyed phrases as "what gets you, and I educate my children," is normal and will pass him angry " "He is good ... just not despair", etc ... just can not keep living in a false charade and let the abuses continue taking place within our homes does more than shelter sites, shelter and love become real fields of torture and concentration.
as I invite my reader to go to the centers of these situations in the state such as the State DIF, the Secretariat of Public Education in the case of violence in schools, I'm sure there will be a prompt response to the situation in your household.
I also encourage you to train parents in schools that are taught in schools of education of their children, often a conference or lecture about human factors environment can open our eyes to our situation and family crisis, the government of Morelos has strongly promoted these workshops to give you tools for your life, never miss the moment, which can provide many insights on how best to proceed in case of abuse that occurs in home environments.
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For a culture of trust
Finally the movie was released expected. A young man goes to the tail of the ticket office to buy some cinema tickets. After two hours of waiting it's turn. Forgot your student card and the ticket lady says, "How I can know you're telling me the truth and you really are a student ?..." The young man smiled resignedly, and said:" I have only my word. " She replies: "Do not know, so therefore I have no reason to distrust you. Here are the entries ... a student price. "
A top executive of an American company comes just in time to catch a flight, but on the counter realizes that, in their haste forgot the ticket office. "Sorry, I can not give you the boarding pass" is the first reaction of the attendant behind the counter. "Miss I have 15 years flying with you, my name is on the computer, there is that bill is paid, but not what I have here ... I only ask you to trust what I say. " And after thinking a few minutes, she asked for his passport, got a copy, and handed him a boarding pass, saying: "I trust his word, just ask let me know that ticket within 48 hours." Three months later, this manager is sought to provide a flight attendant from the more serious business: the care and cultivation of major customers of the company. Had demonstrated that he knew to trust others, and this is the fundamental principle for any relationship that is characterized by being "human."
are two examples that speak for themselves. What we need in our society, to recreate a culture of trust! There are media outlets that have chosen to present always and only evil man. Just making us believe that all human beings are potential enemies each other. It is true that the terrorist attacks we have experienced in recent years do not help to create spaces of trust, but if we abdicate in this struggle to think good of others first, we will be betting on the suicide of humanity. No man or woman who can be happy without feeling that someone trusts him or her. We all do.
From birth, survived thanks to the trust, almost innate, on the other that we care for, to find your right. Do you distrust naturally a child of his mother? o When doubt that his father could wish an evil purpose? In fact, childhood trauma more difficult to overcome precisely from such experiences, because the most natural human psychology is the belief that one who gave me life, I want and look for my good. Naturally tend to rely on them.
All our life is made of acts of trust in each other. We trust that when we see a highway sign indicating dangerous curve, is because it will come. There has been someone who wanted to warn me to avoid danger. We trust when we buy food in supermarket where nobody is going to poison. Trust the doctor's advice, although she knew before attending ... consultation.
Trust between human beings is the fundamental principle that allows the coexistence because it is the base that sustains the human personality, personality fundamentally "relational." All the psychological and spiritual human being is made for the relationship, for love and mutual aid. Largely depend on personal security of personal experience in this field.
believes is expected when the other is someone that in itself is worthwhile, valuable and admirable, and I can learn surely some of it. In a word that is "good for ...." Enough of always thinking that man is a wolf to man! Not true. One thing that anyone has done wrong in one or perhaps several times (as we have all done), and another label for it, that person forever. These tags are sometimes worse than a death sentence because it is difficult to change when no longer trust that person. Confidence in the other starts with positive thinking because to think well of others, trust will flow sincere gestures toward him.
all want a more humane world, but to humanize the human being, start "trusting in him." Human beings generally have a deep sense of justice: to each according to what they deserve. Precisely because we tend to be fair, the most profound changes in human behavior occur when one is treated, not strict justice, but something that goes beyond, with kindness, even though strictly not worth it. Anyone who has read "Les Miserables" by Victor Hugo, recalls the profound change in the heart of the protagonist, at the beginning of the novel. Despite the hospitality, through which John Valjean, an ex-con always hated and treated unfairly, he was invited to dine and sleep in the house of M. Welcome. The inmate gets up at night and runs away after stealing the silverware. Immediately seized by a group of gendarmes, which lead him to the bishop's house. And here is Jean Valjean who excuse to the police, explaining that there was any theft because he had given the silver to sell them. M. justification Welcome to reassure the police and set internally astonished to former convict, "John Valjean opened his eyes and looked at the venerable Bishop with an expression that could not paint any human language." Having won, was not so much justice, but expressed confidence in understanding, apology and kindness. There was someone who believed that despite what happened, he was and could be "good." The experience of this trust, beyond appearances, it changed the hearts and lives forever.
Take a look at what happens when confidence is practiced, and even more so when you choose as usual inner attitude from the other. We discover a wonderful show: retirees who had become as useless to smile with pleasure, young protesters who decide to choose the good for themselves, marriages saved, families help each other succeed, friends that last a lifetime ...
The fact that trust is mutual, feedback and motivation but not required to be practiced. There must be one that begins to trust each other. Every day presents an opportunity to at least one act of faith: What if my marriage now had from me a little more confidence in my spouse? What would today my relationship with my children if I trust them more? What deal would now my employees if I move house to "believe most of them"? What if today I trust my parents and that maybe I want more of what I imagine? The first act of trust can be the beginning of a new relationship and a new way of living. Live in hope.
Some might think that just can not live because they always end up disappointed others. Certainly those who trust in others, suffer some disappointment, but is there biggest disappointment in life that comes from having lost the ability to love and trust each other?
Each person chooses how you want to live and who wants to be. Who decided to opt for trust each other, do not choose to go with stupid face for life, but chooses to try to discover the good men and women, each one carries within it, to let them see themselves and act accordingly. Perhaps it is better to err on having ever more confident that ever hit no love for ever doubting the others.
confidence attracts, fascinates and leaves desire to be better. Change the whole world is gigantic task, but changing around us just depends on our ability to trust others, in which I have closely a little longer to start today to live ... hope.
Entre Familia Soy Feliz
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