Cruisy Spots Pittsburgh

What is the DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

By Dr. Jesus Arina

Currently, the problem of domestic violence against women is so serious that it is comparable with the problem of AIDS. Of 2-4000000 women annually are abused by their partner, husband, boyfriend or lover. Between 15 and 25% of those women are pregnant, which makes the problem even worse.

National statistics show that the battered wife is more damage and need more help and medical treatment to those affected by rape, car accidents and assaults, as a whole. Battered women constitute 20% of women attending emergency services with injuries.

Domestic violence is not always easy to define or recognize. In general terms we could describe it as the deliberate use of force to control or manipulate the couple or their offspring.

is psychological abuse, sexual or physical routine. Happens between people involved emotionally, such as husband and wife or adults against children living in same household.

Domestic violence is not only physical abuse, beatings or injuries. They are even more terrible psychological violence and sexual trauma caused, physical violence, everyone can see. There is violence when it attacks the emotional or spiritual integrity of a person.

But physical violence is always the most obvious, is preceded by a pattern of psychological abuse, which is used systematically to degrade the victim, to undermine and crush the self-esteem of women.

Psychological violence is detected with more difficulty. Who has suffered physical violence is visible traces can be achieved more easily help. However, the victim has scars on the psyche or soul, it is more difficult to get sympathy and help. Too difficult, for example, the manipulative skill of her husband presented his wife as exaggerated complaints.

A precedes physical violence, sometimes, years of psychological violence. Psychological violence is, to despise women, so insulting, that there comes a time when the battered woman psychologically, and believes that those hits you deserve it. And how difficult is to convince a woman to go to for help when you think you do not need it.

Some women are embarrassed by what is happening and believe that even deserving of abuse. Therefore they prefer to keep them secret and so this situation can last for years. Those who abuse their victims they do so according to a pattern of psychological abuse.
As in the case of the alcoholic, who hits a woman or physically or sexually abused, the first thing you do is deny it.

Denial is saying, "No, I hit him with reason." There is no reason to hit a woman, or anyone else. But they deny. They say: "I have not beaten, I would not done anything, just touching it."
Another form of psychological abuse is isolation. I have known cases in which ostracize the woman, nor speak, nor look at her and then she will believe you deserve such treatment.
Bullying is also an abuse. "If you say something I'll kill you." Many women do not dare to speak, by threats that their husbands or partners launched against them.

Another way into this pattern of psychological abuse is to blame the victim, a woman. Since the invention of excuses and that comes from Adam and Eve, one blames the other. Both
any drug addict and an abuser, always have excuses and blame someone.

met a woman whose husband beat her because it put "jeans." And I asked the husband: "You do preferred, to go with a short skirt?" I did not know that answer. I blamed her and beat her so. "No - I said - you do not hit the pants, but because you are an insecure person who does not believe in his mother. Has she given you reason to be jealous?" "No, she would not have missed" I replied. "Then why do you strike?"
also in the habit of psychological abuse is financial abuse. "If you say something I'll give you the monthly payment. "I saw a case where the wife left because she finally went to the police because nearly killed. The man grabbed her by the neck and choking. If not for the child more, he grabbed his father and made him a key, the killing. The 11 year old daughter called police. And this man said no, with all the blows that he still denied it. He called a lawyer and tried to take home to his wife.

The police came, raised his record and when next day the woman was told to ask: "A husband and release them." "How?" "For the sergeant signed the police report. "What women often have the and children? After this the man pushed a divorce, you feel offended, even though nearly killed before his sons. The woman has no money to pay lawyers.

Within that psychological abuse of husbands who beat (which is called in psychology the triangulation), another type of abuse: using children to make them feel guilty wives. In this case the children act as messengers, "Tell your mother ..."
threats by children, the threats that he will remove the child, these are all psychological abuse precedes physical abuse. I know what I predicted to a person at least 8 months earlier. I said, "Her husband is to beat. "No, he is incapable," she answered. And so it happened, though he is Minister of the Eucharist. Not to be Minister for what he has done this, but for not being a good minister.

All these abuses
prevent women leave the home, the violent home. is that the psychological beating it encounters many women, is more dreadful than physical abuse. Ask any woman to whom physically abused what it hurts most, if harsh words, the contempt or shock. The beats are passed, psychological abuse, insults, slights are stuck in the heart.

Note: Dr. Jesus Arina is a psychologist in private practice in Miami, Florida, USA

Entre Familia Soy Feliz